Happy 50th Birthday to me! This is the first time I’ve ever put it out there to people that it’s my birthday. In past years, I’ve never mentioned when it’s my birthday - even on the actual day. Ever. That was me, keeping myself small, not wanting to draw attention to myself.
Why, you might ask? Well, if I draw attention to myself, someone might not like me. They might see my flaws. They might figure out I’m not perfect.
NEWSFLASH: I am so far from perfect…. We all are imperfect.
I have a blackboard in my home that I write quotes on from time to time that really resonate with me. The one that is up there right now is: “Even with your flaws, you are flawless”. It’s so true. And on a good day, I know that. When I’m having a bad day, it’s harder to remember, so I have it written on the board in the center of my house where I can read it and remind myself. My laptop screensaver is the saying: “What if you just turned your magic all the way the fuck on?”
So here I am, at 50, continuing to dive deeper into this lesson around letting myself be fully seen, removing those remaining layers of armor that I’ve been wearing my whole life as protection from feeling inadequate and getting hurt.
This might just be the year that I turn my magic all the way the f*ck on.